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| Balamory Popular kids show set in the fictional town of Balamory. Only the very cunning will spot that it is in fact a thinly veiled Tobermory hiding behind the scenes. Remember when the cast were up in arms because the show was cancelled? Why? Have they never watched children's TV? Did they not realise that Derek Griffiths wasn't actually still wearing flares in the 1990s? Did they think he was just ageing extremely well? Children's TV bosses learned long ago about children's inability to notice that episodes of their favourite shows rotate every fortnight. Balamory is a classic example of them exploiting this phenomenon mercilessly. Colourful houses and plots written in fifteen minutes whilst suffering severe hangovers are the name of the game in this CBeebies classic. So what's the story in Balamory? Lets meet the cast. Miss Hoolie Nursery teacher by day, many a dad's ideal woman by night. The star of the show and all round nice person. You can't fail to notice however that it's all smiles until she has to come into contact with children. Being a nursery teacher would be alright except for the kids. An entirely different group of children appear each day, giving rise to a number of sinister conspiracy theories around the www. Unfortunately the producers forgot to cast someone who could sing or act in the role of Miss Hoolie, and this makes for painful viewing at times. PC Plum Noticing that one of their new recruits was 'different' to the others, Strathclyde Police wasted no time in dispatching him as far out of harm's way as possible. This is a policeman with a difference. He sings and dances and has the best cheery wave that you'll ever see. A friend thought that PC Plum and Miss Hoolie stepped out together once the cameras stopped rolling, but I think that he'd rather be heading to Archie's for a cuppa, if you know what I mean. Dangerously inept at his job, he once had local residents believing there was a crime wave going on, just because he had forgotten to give out so much lost property. Penny Pocket Gangsta Rapping, Wheelchair-bound, Chav-chic, Geordie Shop Assistant, Penny is a typical example of the sort of people you run across in the Western Isles all the time. (Okay, I shouldn't mock, I applaud the show for it's diversity of characters.) She will organise you whether you like it or not. Given that she works with Suzie Sweet, this is no bad trait to have. Suzie Sweet From Glendarroch to Balamorey, walking advert for HRT, Suzie, bumbles her way through life. There are goldfish with better short term memories and Suzie relies heavily on colleague Penny to survive. Penny and Susie are 'House-Mates' and 'Best Friends'. We were also told once that Penny was waking Suzie up by talking in her sleep. It's not for me to read anything into that, of course. Edie McRedie Glamorous local entrepreneur, Edie, runs local firm McRedie's Transport. Given that Balamory seems to consist of two streets, it's mystifying how she makes a living. The fireman's pole in her business premises is just the start of her fixation with men in uniform and she's always sniffing around PC Plum (You're barking up the wrong tree, love!) Her innuendo packed song in later episodes, "Come Up and See Me Sometime", sounds like it belongs in a vaudeville act. We can't escape a nagging doubt however that if she "showed us it all", we'd be in for a surprise. Josie Jump Even Josie Jump doesn't know why Josie Jump is in the show. Makes the actress playing Miss Hoolie look like Laurence Olivier. NEW: Read the Buki Akib Conspiracy theory here. Spencer The show doesn't draw any differentiation between painter of the 'and decorator' variety and painter of the 'grand master' type. Spencer is equally poor at both varieties on the evidence of the show. Wears a continual look of surprise, which seems to say, 'How am I getting away with pretending to be a painter?'. Archie Local land-owning toff, Archie is the Lord of the Manor. The episode featuring him heavily, where he burned the rest of the village, turned it into farmland and sent the cast to work in the mills in the Central Belt was axed. Wears a pink jumper, lives in a pink castle and is 'good friends' with PC Plum. Need we say more. Back to Parents Guide to Kids TV |
| This article was written by Duncan Conner. When not annoying television executives, he runs Bus Stop Toy Shop and sells some great toys for kids of all ages. Why not have a glance around the main Bus Stop Toy Shop website while your here? Better still you can sign up to our monthly newsletter (details at the top right of every page) and keep up to date with the very best in toys. If you enjoyed the article, you can share it with others from your blog/facebook/twitter/bebo/myspace/etc by copying and pasting the following code: <a href="http://www.busstoptoyshop.com/balamory2">A Parent's Guide to Balamory</a> |