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Popular kids show set in the fictional town of Balamory. Only the very
cunning will spot that it is in fact a thinly veiled Tobermory hiding behind the
scenes.
Remember when the cast were up in arms because the show was cancelled?
Why? Have they never watched children's TV? Did they not realise that
Derek Griffiths wasn't actually still wearing flares in the 1990s? Did they think
he was just ageing extremely well?
Children's TV bosses learned long ago about children's inability to notice that
episodes of their favourite shows rotate every fortnight. Balamory is a classic
example of them exploiting this phenomenon mercilessly.
Colourful houses and plots written in fifteen minutes whilst suffering severe
hangovers are the name of the game in this CBeebies classic.
So what's the story in Balamory? Lets meet the cast.
Miss Hoolie
Nursery teacher by day, many a dad's ideal woman by night. The star of the
show and all round nice person. You can't fail to notice however that it's all
smiles until she has to come into contact with children. Being a nursery
teacher would be alright except for the kids.
Unfortunately the producers forgot to cast someone who could sing or act in
the role, and this makes for painful viewing at times.
PC Plum
Noticing that one of their new recruits was 'different' to the others,
Strathclyde Police wasted no time in dispatching him as far out of harm's way
as possible. This is a policeman with a difference. He sings and dances and
has the best cheery wave that you'll ever see.
A friend thought that PC Plum and Miss Hoolie stepped out together once the
cameras stopped rolling, but I think that he'd rather be heading to Archie's
for a cuppa, if you know what I mean.
Dangerously inept at his job, he once had local residents believing there was
a crime wave going on, just because he had forgotten to give out so much
lost property.
Penny Pocket
Gangsta Rapping, Wheelchair-bound, Chav-chic, Geordie Shop Assistant,
Penny is a typical example of the sort of people you run across in the
Western Isles all the time. (Okay, I shouldn't mock, I applaud the show for it's
diversity of characters.)
She will organise you whether you like it or not. Given that she works with
Suzie Sweet, this is no bad trait to have.
Suzie Sweet
From Glendarroch to Balamorey, walking advert for HRT, Suzie, bumbles her
way through life. There are goldfish with better short term memories and
Suzie relies heavily on colleague Penny to survive. Penny and Susie are
'House-Mates' and 'Best Friends'. We were also told once that Penny was
waking Suzie up by talking in her sleep. It's not for me to read anything into
that, of course.
Edie McRedie
Glamorous local entrepreneur, Edie, runs local firm McRedie's Transport.
Given that Balamory seems to consist of two streets, it's mystifying how she
makes a living. The fireman's pole in her business premises is just the start
of her fixation with men in uniform and she's always sniffing around PC Plum
(You're barking up the wrong tree love!)
Josie Jump
Even Josie Jump doesn't know why Josie Jump is in the show. Makes the
actress playing Miss Hoolie look like Laurence Olivier. NEW: Read the Buki
Akib Conspiracy theory here.
Spencer
The show doesn't draw any differentiation between painter of the 'and
decorator' variety and painter of the 'grand master' type. Spencer is equally
poor at both varieties on the evidence of the show. Wears a continual look
of surprise, which seems to say, 'How am I getting away with pretending to be
a painter?'.
Archie
Local land-owning toff, Archie is the Lord of the Manor. Lives in a big pink
castle. The episode featuring him heavily, where he burned the rest of the
village, turned it into farmland and sent the cast to work in the mills in the
Central Belt was axed. Wears a pink jumper, lives in a pink castle and is
'good friends' with PC Plum. Need we say more.
Back to Parents Guide to Kids TV
Jump?
Read The Buki Akib Conspiracy
Theory here.
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